Bedtime. I hate it. I hate the whole process. I hate how my son argues and negotiates and refuses to just wind down. He's constantly moving and thinking and just stubborn. Once I get him in bed, the getting up for multiple reasons begins. I hear, "I'm hungry. I'm thirsty. There are monsters. I'm having bad dreams." I'm pretty sure bad dreams only happen after you are asleep, but let my kid tell it you can be awake too. I get angrier and angrier the more he gets up. My work gets put off later and later with each interruption. No matter what time we start the process, he just does not go to sleep at a reasonable hour. Sometimes I just have him lay down in the living room in hopes he just falls asleep while I work, just to keep the aggravation of his getting out of bed to a minimum.
I thought school would wear him out and make him go to sleep earlier. Nope. He's just as wound up after school, through dinner, and beyond bedtime. What's worse is he gets MORE hyper as he gets more and more tired. Like now. He was just bouncing off the walls and getting up and wanting to watch the election results with me. I'm glad he's interested in the elections, in that he watches for the checkmarks for blue candidates. I just don't want that at 10:30 pm. I'm starting to think X@nax was made for mothers who have to put stubborn children to bed. Heaven knows I could use one at bed time to keep me sane most days.
So here I am, my son is finally falling asleep, FINALLY! All I feel is guilt and shame that I can't even get a 4 year old in bed. Why? How can I not control a 4 year old child's bed time? I'm definitely feeling like a crappy mom tonight, and wondering how come other moms seem to be able to manage multiple children without freaking out. I have one and I feel like it's chaos here at night. I try to roll with the punches. I try. My patience has limits and I am not letting this child run things here. Oh well. I seriously hope this gets better when he goes to kindergarten all day or we're going to have a super stressed out mom here.
Now that he's sleeping, I can finally get my work done. Another all-nighter in store.