Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Social Mom

Even though I wanted to write about my love of the Beatles today, I won't because that's just too expected.  So instead I'll talk about being social as an introverted mom.  So much more interesting, I know.

Because I'm new to this area and my son just started 4-K so I'm having to really make an effort to put myself out there and get to know other moms.  In Chicago, I started a single mom's group and it was a major metro area so meeting people was easier.  This is a much smaller town, even through the major city is just as far away from me now as it was in Chicago!  It's just not suburban all the way out from Milwaukee to where I am.  It's more like farms and towns intermittently scattered up to my location and then a few bigger cities up north.  So getting to know people has been interesting.  And I thought the parents would chat more and whatever while we stood out with our kids on the playground.  Not so much.  I don't get it at all.  I'd love to say it's me, or my single parenthood status, but I don't really see them talking to anyone or each other either.  Thankfully I did bond to another mom who I really like and have been able to support through a major life issue.  I'm telling you, I'm somehow in the right place at the right time when people's lives fall out from under them.  Maybe I'm in the wrong line of work???

Anyway, today I ran into another mom from my son's class while I was at the store.  I always kind of watched other women who ran into people they knew in the store with a tinge of jealously.  I wondered if I would become that person and stop feeling like a stranger who just wanders around alone all time.  It honestly didn't help that we didn't really get any kind of list of parent's names that go with the other children in class.  Honestly, who wants to be so & so's mom when we have our own names?  So the mom and I start talking and she's obviously really involved in the school and it's events.  While we small talked, which I suck at knowing when to end and walk away, we decided to exchange phone numbers.  This is so weird for me and it's because I'm so private and terrible with social protocol.  I mean, I barely know her and we were invited to come play, and to come help at a school event next month.

Have I mentioned how freaked out I get in a big group of people I don't know and how I will blurt out crazy stuff?  Other parents/moms I don't know who all practically grew up here and their parents grew up here...oh boy.  So what I"m going to do is go and force myself to talk to other moms so I can make friends here.  Even though I would feel more comfortable with meeting other single moms, it looks like I'll have to start another group here too if I want that to happen.  I don't know how well it will be received or if it will be like my group in the Chicago area, but I have to do something.  I'm going to have to fake it until I feel it.

I don't regret moving here but I'm just not feeling like I fit in yet either.  All I know is that I better figure it out because my son is a social butterfly and I know I'm going to have to figure this all out real quick.

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