I think I'm struggling to find my identity as a parent to a kid in school. Not only that, but in a town where you run into people you know constantly because your kids recognize each other. It's so odd when my kid and I are walking around and suddenly my kid or another kid is telling me they know each other! Even more so when people tell me they already know our business because they know someone who told them before we did! Then I wonder if I'm stuck here in this town forever because my kid is in school already. Do I want to stay here or do I want to move back to IL and the schools there? I'm so conflicted.
There are so many things that I worry and think about and I never considered that this mother would have the same issues as I do. Sometimes it's hard to get past the pre-conceived notions we have from someone's exterior image. Do I want to be a PTO mom or a room mom or someone who comes up with class activities and events? Do I want to be a once a month mom who comes to help for field trips or various monthly activities? I don't know yet. I don't know where I'm at with everything that comes with the territory of a kid in school. it's such a fine line for me.
Right now, with the both of us in school at the same time, I find even just getting us both ready is a challenge. I'm not sure I want to add anything else to that. Maintaining friendships with these other moms is difficult too. It's not helping that I've been sick this week, and Noah went into the hospital because of a cough & sinus infection that caused bronchiolitis. He's missed almost a day every week because of it. I worry that the other moms are judging me, and one even joked that we were coming in late one day because we couldn't get up in time. It was nice to shoot her down with "He was in the hospital" but it's obvious the though is already out there.
I just need to remember I'm not the only one going through stuff at home. Did I mention I'm also dreading parent teacher conferences next week?